• The Rebel Rouser News
  • TRR: Hillary Clinton Finally Finds The Perfect Christmas Gift For Bill: Nintendo’s Balloon Fight

    “Don’t tell him, it’s a surprise!” the official Presidential nominee of the Democratic National Convention told us in an exclusive interview after her nomination. The former Secretary of State was using the opportunity to pre-order Nintendo’s upcoming NES Classic Edition on her phone, presumably for her husband and former POTUS himself, Bill Clinton. When asked […]

  • The Rebel Rouser News
  • TRR: Boy Scout Nintendo Reminds Shareholders It Didn’t Make Pokémon Go; Apparently Hates Money

    Never one to enjoy a healthy profit margin for long, Nintendo today issued a statement to stockholders reminding the morons that they did not create the hit mobile application Pokémon Go. The result of reminding the powers that be was, of course, that their $3 billion value lead over previous industry leader Sony evaporated in […]